The Family That Decided Not To Stay Home

by Eleanore and Carolyn

Once upon a time, on a cloudy, drizzly, cozy morning in France, all the french families in the village took the opportunity to have a relaxing day, at home with their books and their coffee and their little yappy dogs snuggled safe and sound in their laps. All the families...but one.

The eldest of the two daughters in this family, having ascended the stairs to their top at approximately 11:00, announced to her charming father, "Father Dearest, I look so forward to having a lovely day at home with tea and my slippers." With outstretched arms, she reacquainted him with the misery of the weather outside and awaited his response.

"Well, Eldest Daughter, your mother and I have been plotting the day's possibilities and we have decided upon A Walk."

"A what?"

"A Walk."

"To where does one walk in this weather?"

The youngest of the daughters raised her pinky and replied, "Eldest Sister, they are leading us to the nearby village St. Maximin for lunch at a reputable cafe."

The Eldest Daughter's mouth dropped. "St. Max-i-min. Is. 6. Kilometers. Away. There are plenty of lovely cafes in our civilized village." At which point the Eldest daughter looked out, once again, at the miserable weather and wept.

"Daughters, why don't you run along and prepare the pack with provisions," said the daughters' mother.

"Dearest Father?"

"Yes, Frances, my youngest daughter."

"Are we there yet?" she asked as they stepped off the front porch into the drizzling rain.

Their promenade took them through dastardly muddy forests. "Does anybody manage these hills?" asked the mother of the daughters.

They past slimy, moss-covered rock walls. "Oh, Honorable Mum, I'm not trying mean or anything, but this is an, um, awful walk that you've instructed us to do."

They examined their maps at V's in the paths. "Father, I mean, Lovely, Charming, Navigationally Gifted Father, um, are you sure we're going the right way?"

Along the way, they spoke of important topics. The younger daughter asked her father, "Father, what are you going to be when you grow up?"

And right in this moment the father expressed his deepest longings, "I'd love to be a sailor and sail the 7 seas."

They saw the local plantlife, the vineyards and the neighborhoods of the countryside,and at each spectacle, the youngest daughter asked, "Dearest Father?" and the father recited, "Yes, Frances my youngest daughter," and the daughter asked, "Are we there yet?"

"Oh, Dearest Mother, I could die right now of hunger," moaned the eldest daughter.

"Well, let's walk in the cemetery and pay our respects to Great Great Great Great Great Grandfather Edward," said Father, completely ignoring Eleanore's near-death comment.

"Oh, dear. It looks like Great Great Great Great Great Grandfather Edward ran away," whispered the befuddled mother.

"Well, he was always was a restless one," the eldest daughter Eleanore muttered.

After a strenuous walk, all hopes were dashed when they found the restaurant....CLOSED. Without even stopping to take a breath (or a photo), the family with blistered feet and rumbling stomachs, turned bravely back around to whence they came.

"Dearest Father?"

"Yes, Frances my Youngest Daughter."

"Are we there yet?"

"We were. But now we're not."

"WHAT!"

After a bit of the walk back, the family sat on the gravel driveway into someone else's vineyard and ate their provisions, as soggy and unapetizing as they were: corncakes with creamed cheese, old cashews, yellow sawdust-tasting raisins, one bruised banana, and a measely chunk of chocolate.

"Father Dearest. Is that a drop of rain I feel on the tip of my nose?" asked the eldest of the daughters.

"Yes. Wipe it off with your hanky and let's get moving."

As quick as a flash of lightning, rain poured upon them.

A film crew came along to document the pouring rain for the weather show. They took great footage of Mother Dearest and Younger Sister. Watch the interview here:

After hours of traveling overland, not one, not two, not three, four or five, but six kilometers back to their home, the fearless family was exhausted and starving.

The depressed Eldest Daughter, said, "Dearest Father, I have found something good to eat. May I?"

"What is it?"

"Why it's a larvae. It looks so awfully scrumptuous and juicy and perfectly fleshy. I can feel my mouth watering now."

"Dearest Daughter, my eldest you and your sister have surpassed my expecations in courage and determination. I am taking you both straight away to eat a crepe. I shall put that larvae back where you found it on the path."

But the eldest daughter had such a heart, even in her weariest moments, she begged her father to set the poor, dear larvae down in the bush on the side of the trail so it would not get stepped on by fellow walkers.

Fighting delirium in the center of town, each daughter was given by their beloved father 2 euros to buy a crepe. They each asked Beatrice the Crepe Maker, "Je voudrais le crepe sucre avec chantilly, s'il vous plait."

And the family sat down and started to eat and lived happily ever after.

The End

Moral of the story: Ice cream is for hot days, crepes are for cold days, but actually, crepes are good on any day.

See the movie here:

This story is dedicated to the ones who made us take the walk, Mother and Father Dearest